Down the Rabbit Hole

Our kids teach us so much, and lately, watching my kids, I'm reminded of how I pursued my own passions as a child.

Over Winter Break, we stuck well to our little schedule and more or less tucked into a bubble within our home. That meant that my kids had oodles of time to dive deep into anything they wanted to do.

My oldest doodled around on the piano, learning Luisa's song "Under Pressure," and followed his deep and abiding love for Lego building. He became mildly obsessed with building World War II Lego scenes, which resulted in a deep dive into children's books about World War II and some cool conversations about my own family's involvement in the war (as an aside, I wrote a YA book loosely based on family experiences, and, maybe someday, the world will get to see it!). He attended camp for a couple of days and learned how to play foosball...so, naturally, he came home and built a working foosball Lego table.  

This isn't just a big ole list of what my kid did over Winter Break, it's a journey into how his brain works, and how I'd like mine to work, too.  When he's interested in something, he follows that interest down a wide and winding path. He dives down the rabbit hole, and I totally admire that trait.  

With my own fractured, working-mom mind, I spend more of my hobby time watching ridiculous reels on Instagram (or, as I describe them to my husband, "dumb tiktok videos," because that's the same thing) than I do pursuing my actual interests.

A goal I have for myself this year - a multi-faceted goal - is to actually pursue my interests. This doesn't mean that I need to go out and buy a million new supplies for a hobby, but it does mean I need to read beyond the first book in a series before moving on to something else.  It also means that if I'm interested in a topic, whether it's a musical artist or an art project, I should let myself fall into it.

I've gotten started. I'm reading the second in the Wayfarer Series by Becky Chambers and have other sequels to other series in mind. I'm insisting that when we start a movie as a family, we finish that movie before we move onto a new one.  I'm hoping to pull all the fractured parts together and make my mind into the fine tuned machine it once was.

And do you know? It's working.  When I settle in to read a book with characters I already know, or a writer's familiar writing style, it feels good.  When I picked up the yarn to finger knit for a second time (gasp), I liked that I had a better grasp on what I was doing. I like that, over break, we finished a home improvement project by painting a single wall and installing a plant shelf - a fairly simple task that had eluded us for months. I'm getting back to feeling satisfied by my interests and pursuits.

I admire how my son picks up an interest and actually follows it. He's always got a few threads of interest trailing behind him, at varying levels, but he's not constantly picking up something knew.  He allows himself to dive in and really learn about a topic, whether it's fishing, making working Lego machines, or improving his soccer skills. 

My children teach me constantly, and I want to actively take on this lesson my firstborn teaches me daily.

Here's hoping I can feed myself with more than quick videos on social media and pursue interests with the same interest as a fourth-grader with no responsibilities.